Things I Miss...
I've heard lots of opinions on the hardest period after losing a spouse. It's the first year, its the second year, its after my kids finished high school etc. I don't think the answer is the same for everyone and I know that we never stop grieving. I'm sure it will diminish in time and it certainly isn't as overwhelming as the first three months - when I struggled to drag myself out of bed.
There are moments though, things that happen, trips down memory lane that come with and without triggers - they take me back to a different time, make me long for his presence. Of late, I've been thinking of all the things I miss.
Here is my list of things I miss - I suspect I'll add to it time and again:
#8 I miss his opinion, thoughts on the matter and consultation on so many things - I know he would laugh at this and say, "You did whatever you wanted anyway." That was probably true sometimes, and sometimes not, but I sure miss having him as a sounding board.
#7 I miss having someone to share my day with, both in conversation and by sending photos - which I did of often throughout the week. Recently, I was introduced to "Jack" fruit. My first thought was to send a photo to him because he would enjoy it. But, quickly I remembered he's not on the other side of the text. I know he would've responded "buy one, let's try it."
#6 I miss his practical jokes. On really hot days, he thought it was funny to turn on my heated seats while I was not looking. After sweating like a pig for a while it would dawn on me that he turned it on. He always denied it.
#5 I miss having someone tell me, "you're taking that too seriously, let it go." (btw, this was long before Disney got a hold of the phrase). He had a way of keeping me grounded.
#4 I miss realizing midway through the day that we were "color coordinated" which he did on purpose and thought it was hysterical generally by the time I figured it out, it was too late to change clothes.
#3 I miss his company on car rides and the weird conversations we had about everything; life, music, death, politics, illness and family - no topic was taboo.
#2 I miss having someone to reach over and touch in the morning. I still reach over, but his side is empty.
#1 I miss knowing that there is someone in the world who would always pick me first in kickball.
There are moments though, things that happen, trips down memory lane that come with and without triggers - they take me back to a different time, make me long for his presence. Of late, I've been thinking of all the things I miss.
Here is my list of things I miss - I suspect I'll add to it time and again:
#8 I miss his opinion, thoughts on the matter and consultation on so many things - I know he would laugh at this and say, "You did whatever you wanted anyway." That was probably true sometimes, and sometimes not, but I sure miss having him as a sounding board.
 |
| Jack Fruit |
#7 I miss having someone to share my day with, both in conversation and by sending photos - which I did of often throughout the week. Recently, I was introduced to "Jack" fruit. My first thought was to send a photo to him because he would enjoy it. But, quickly I remembered he's not on the other side of the text. I know he would've responded "buy one, let's try it."
#6 I miss his practical jokes. On really hot days, he thought it was funny to turn on my heated seats while I was not looking. After sweating like a pig for a while it would dawn on me that he turned it on. He always denied it.
#5 I miss having someone tell me, "you're taking that too seriously, let it go." (btw, this was long before Disney got a hold of the phrase). He had a way of keeping me grounded.
#4 I miss realizing midway through the day that we were "color coordinated" which he did on purpose and thought it was hysterical generally by the time I figured it out, it was too late to change clothes.
#3 I miss his company on car rides and the weird conversations we had about everything; life, music, death, politics, illness and family - no topic was taboo.
#2 I miss having someone to reach over and touch in the morning. I still reach over, but his side is empty.
#1 I miss knowing that there is someone in the world who would always pick me first in kickball.
Comments
Post a Comment